{Fleeting Contentment}
Love begins with a smile and ends up with a tear, when you travel
the path of life and when you find love along your way, it makes you feel
everything new and different, but it is the same old scenery; we used to see
all of our time. Love has just given you the power of insight for your feelings.
Yangsel
believed to be a fortunate fellow, when he got hooked up in a relationship with
Yangki, his transitory relation kept him and his heart wondering, with worldly
pleasure. His wandering was but analogous to those hasting crystalline morning
dews. Yangsel was oblivious that it is not at all meant to see perpetually, his
happiness deceived him to realize the shower of his happiness in future. Couple
of years has made their way in proving their true love and sacrifice for each
other, shadow of sadness and cause of anguish did not make their way in between
them to impediment their happiness.
Song of
gesture and rhythm of whisper, exploited the loud guffaw of their hearty smile;
the monthly remuneration of them was good enough for them to have everything
they used to crave, but the euphoric moment was running before their
realization for the need of child in between them. One day, Yangsel willed up
his confidence, holed his dear one at his comfy arm and with glittering smile,
he uttered few but invaluable words to her, “Yangki,” ‘shall we have a child
now!?’ Yangki didn’t utter even a word but just nodded her head, brimming with
a smile…!
Three
months later, the symptoms of pregnancy started to attest that Yangki is going
to make Yangsel a father of a child. Knowing that, he took her to hospital for
check-up with utmost happy and serene mood. Their happiness continued for
another six month.
Six months later, it was the toughest, as well as happy time
for the couple; the time for Yangsel to owe the title of father and Yangki, a
title of maternity. Finally, the time of serenity has illuminated the heart of
the couple, with the early greetings of yet unborn child. Though it was like
upstream-swimming for Yangki but the hilarity and glamor of front foot-step
and the fetter of faith, love and sacrifice they have rendered towards each
other has besieged all those obstacles of her.
It was on
30th of September, 1988; the time hardest for Yangki to toil through
and show her everyday smile for Yangsel. It was the time, when Yangki bore a
daughter to Yangsel; illuminating whole of his heart with supremacy of smile.
“But is it their faith that has cheated them...?’ Or is it that they were not
at all meant for each other for little longer…?” ‘It seemed that the crossroad of their faith,
which has brought them together, has come to an end.’ Slowly, Yangki started to
capitulate the symptoms of ailment, and serenity started to diminish in the
mind of Yangsel.
The time
of tranquility has transformed itself into the time of trauma; worry of losing
Yangki has made Yangsel to endure the forlorn sleepless night, no hunger, no
thirst but only the source-less tears and salty sweats. It was time for the
days and miles to divide them, Yangsel tried his best to cure Yangki but not an
iota of the medicine has proven their strength to bring Yangki back into her
normal life. She became so frail, failed even to recognize her own child and
husband.
Her speech
was worse than the whisper in the air; no smile, no food, no drink but only
those wide opened weeping eyes. Yangsel was left with no options, but only to
knell down by Yangki and to swap away those tears of desolation and
difficulties of their yesterday’s tranquil life.
A day
before the eternal leave of Yangki, Yangsel just happened to take a short nap
by the side of Yangki, where he had a reverie of her; he saw that she was
becoming alright and saw wearing white cloth with long cascading hair, blown
away gently, by the gentle breeze. It brought him the happiness in dream but
his dream remained as a dream itself. In reality, Yangki was undergoing deep
soreness and was helpless to rebuff the ruthless order of the deadly
death.
It was when she stretched out her
hand for the very last time, with her last intake of breath for eternal leave;
it struck the head of Yangsel, which awaken him from his fleeting dream.
Yangsel called for help with hand and mouth, drenching in pound of tears, but
it was too late for him, as Yangki has just slipped away for eternal liberty
before his knowing.
The time
of togetherness, sharing dreams, love, live, life and laughter with hearty
smile haunted him deeply day by day, after she has taken the heavenly way. The
very time they have shared with the blossom of their lives has come to shrivel,
leaving only those reminiscences so sweet yet strongly bitter. One roof they
once lived under, sometimes with smile, sometimes with tear through those
autumn storms and thunder has brought him nothing but never ending times of
nostalgia.
The years
have faded fast, showing them the separate ways, like the whispering wind of
summer season, for the arrival of autumn thunder, and the live whispered them
the presence of death. Time has of departure has come along their way and made
apart not only their secret shackle in between them, but also traumatized their
very dreams, hopes, and happiness together; it has silenced their love and care
with those unseen tears.
It was after
the 49th day and after the final funeral of Yangki, Yangsel was just
flipping their album, leaning on his usual quiescent place just near the
sitting place of Yangki and swinging his dear daughter in her cradle. He could
not comfort his eyes filling with those purls of tears, at that very moment, a
small piece of paper dropped into the floor from inside the album. He picked it
up with care, and mutely read it down, which conveyed the following messages of
late dear Yangki to desperate Yangsel……..
Dear my dear…
Death is nothing at all, it only
meant for us and all, I have only slipped away and taken the eternal roof for
liberty. ‘’I am so sorry for leaving you
behind all of a sudden’’ ‘the time of eternity has made it obligatory for me.’ ‘‘I
gave you nothing that worth your love, care and the happiness you have rendered
for me, but I have left for you the manacle of reminiscences in between us,’’ ‘
please nurture, give love and care to our daughter.’ ‘‘Never let her to realize
the time of orphanage.’’ ‘I am sorry the time didn’t permit me to breathe and
accompany you to accomplish those dreams of you; we have shared and promised to
travel together through…’
Never feel forlorn and always call
me by my old familiar name, always speak with me in the easiest way you used to
do and put no difference in your tone. Always laugh as we always used to laugh at our
little jokes and never let to overwhelm your happiness by those moments of
solemnity. Never keep me out of your heart and
mind, thinking that I am out of your sight.
Faith
is the inauguration of the human expedition for self-discovery. Faith can be
neither forced nor taught but we must respect it…Life is a strange and it tells
us the strange stories. “What to do,” I don’t have a mind to leave you behind
and go beyond your sight but I am helpless today. ‘Almighty did not give me the
armor to trounce the death.’ I was the luckiest of all to have you as my true
loving and caring partner though I was meant only with short live.
I have nothing more to say to you
but I always urge you to start your live with new beginning. Set your new
dreams, hopes and build your new shell of happiness. Always try to be as you
were and are, never lose the lesson when you lose everything but be determined.
Always feel that I am always there
with you though not personally but spiritually to travel together the trouble.
My prayers and great wishes I have left for you shall always be there to
cherish you during the period of emptiness. I am leaving my ever love, care and
my remembrance to you my dear…. “I have left with no choice than to depart from
your love for my eternal peace,” till then please pray for me to be assured
with the destined destiny…
With ever love…
Yours dear
Yangki
It is
universal, for death will even not prejudice the enlightened ones. We should
accept the warmth of those fleeting containment but at the same time we should
also evoke our thought that there is time for every wound to heal, a time of
tear for our cheer, and a time of silent for our laughter. Happiness is never
always our and sadness is never always others, they always circumambulates us
till we leave for eternal liberty.
Monmoti Subba
BA-Dzo-Media ‘I’
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